14 November 2012

Top Five Reasons Connecticut Should Secede First!

Given all the secession talk since the reelection of the President, maybe the Land of Steady Habits needs to be "Still Revolutionary" indeed!

Here are the top 5 reasons we shouldn't be late to the secession party:

5.  We don't want to be the guy who's left picking up the tab after all the other diners in his group have already left -- with their "I think that's about what I owe" (wink, wink) on the table!

4.  Hartford as a NATIONAL capitol; that would definitely bring back the Whalers!

3.  Secession worked out pretty well in the 19th Century, right?

2.  Think of the bumper stickers the Connecticut Board of Regents for Higher Education could sell:
"You can't spell secession without CONnScu"
(okay, well, maybe you can)

1.  With a whole new government in Connecticut, I'm betting that Linda MacMahon would happily serve as our Commander-in-Chief!

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