Now HERE'S an idea...

My wife and daughters keep talking about getting ourselves a Wii -- those game systems that allow you to play tennis, baseball, or the cello; bowl; box; pitch; and/or do long division (okay maybe not that last one) instead of actually going out to do any of those things.

Now, regular readers would think that such a thing would be right up my (bowling) alley. They'd be wrong. Call me old-fashioned, but, if you're going to bowl or play tennis or box, then, unless you live in an assisted living facility, get thee to a bowling alley, a tennis court, or a Gold's Gym. The odds are that the vast majority of Wii-owners do have the mobility to go out and participate in all these activities, so why do them virtually?

Don't worry, I do know why, but I needed a set up for this:

For those of us who,

on the one hand, have neither the intellectual capacity nor the extensive experience that can foster such feelings,

and,

on the other, are quite good at lying around the house,

I suggest a new gaming system that allows for inactivity within a virtual space where one's worldliness just weighs you down.

It's name?

You guessed it:

EN-Wii